Sexual relations are for the pleasure of both the husband and the wife and for the procreation of children. Sexual intercourse is not limited to vaginal penetration but includes other forms of sexual caressing, such as kissing and fondling of various kinds.
With a few exceptions, the couple can engage in any activities that they like, in any manner and in any position. Allah rewards such activities as surely as he punishes sinful activities. The Qur'an says, "Women are your fields. Go then into your fields as you please." (2:223)
It is forbidden to have vaginal intercourse while a woman is menstruating (Qur'an 2:222). According to the Sunnah of the Prophet
, a man and his menstruating wife can however give one another pleasure so long as the woman's genitals are avoided.
There are Hadith that forbid anal intercourse and scholars generally agree that it is not permissible.
The Qur'an and the Sunnah are generally silent as to the various forms that sexual relations may take. Most authorities consider that it is up to the husband and wife in love and mutual respect to decide how to physically express their sexual desires.
What goes on in bedroom, is a private matter and should not be discussed or revealed to other persons unless there is some necessity, such as health or safety. Abu Hurairah narrates that the Prophet said this about people who reveal and discuss openly their sexual practices: "Do you know what those who do this are like? Those who do this are like a male and female devil who meet each other on the road and satisfy their desire while the people look on."
Prohibition of Temporary Sexual Relations
There are 4 types of temporary sexual relations:
a) temporary marriage, mut'at
b) prostitution, bighaa
c) adultery between consenting adults, zina
d) marriage with the hidden intention to divorce after a time, zawaaj bi niyyat al talaq.
They are forbidden because they reduce the sexual relation to its physical form without regard to the emotional, psychological, and social dimensions. They undermine and destroy the fabric of society. Temporary marriage, mut'at, is forbidden by law. This is a type of marriage contracted by both parties for a fixed period of time. It violates the need for children to be reared in a permanent family. Humans require at least 15 years to be reared to adulthood. Prostitution is the exchange of sexual favors for money. It is physical enjoyment without emotional or psychological involvement. The law prohibits forcing girls into prostitution for the sake of money. Adultery, zina, may have some form of emotional and psychological involvement besides the physical enjoyment but these are temporary. Marriage with the intention of divorcing- the practice involves dishonesty on the part of the husband by failing to disclose his full intentions to the partner. Disclosure would of course turn this type of marriage into a form of mut'at marriage, therefore forbidden.
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Permission of Sexual Intercourse from the Age of Puberty
Islam is the truth from the creator, and Allah has created humans in a manner that they are capable of bearing children from the age of puberty. When this age is achieved, Islam gives the individuals the right to marry with the consent of their guardians. The evidence of this is the marriage of Aisha(r) to Mohammed - when she reached the age of puberty the marriage was consummated. In the world today we often hear of 'teenage pregnancies' and such issues which is a clear indication that there are various cases where individuals who have reached puberty feel the need to become sexually active. Thus Islam has allowed marriage at such an age as long as the education and well being of the two individuals is safeguarded.
Age Differences
There is no restriction in Islam with regards to age differences between the spouses. The exception is that no sexual relationships may be enjoined before puberty is reached. The woman or the man may be older or younger than the other, it does not matter since God allows it. It is only human ignorance that they still look negatively upon an older woman marrying a younger man or vice versa. Islam however puts no restrictions in this regards and looks positively at the concept of marriage, irrespective of age differences.
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